It’s 4 am. Ugh. Way too early again.
Normal people would have thrown the blankets on and slept peacefully again, it’s Saturday after all. But, the weird being that I am, I got out of bed, and made myself some delicious brewed coffee and toast on my small but functional kitchen.
I sat down on a couch near the window of my apartment and began munching on my breakfast. I thought of everything that happened yesterday, and to an extent, thought of things about my life right now. If you ask anyone who knew me, they would say I am doing good, great actually. Working, living on my own, earning, giving back, living the life of an accomplished young adult in my chosen career, essentially happy- this is how I can be described at twenty five. I am no billionaire, nor am I a superstar, but I was content. People would ask me, what I can say about my life, about how I reached this state. What would I say to my 24 year old self? Shall I write a letter to her?
Love C, love…
You were always scared, always cautious. You guarded your heart from breaking, and I understand that, but make space for love. Love is a wonderful thing, and you cannot deny that it made you happy once. It was unfortunate yes, but you came out stronger and wiser. Wasn’t it you who said that in everything, take what is happy and leave what is crap? Love isn’t crap C, sometimes it’s us, and sometimes it’s the circumstances surrounding us. You never know when love comes and passes by. Life is never too long, never too fair, never too perfect. Grab your chances, and fight for what is yours.
Family, indeed, is everything
Your pride yourself with this. You love them above and beyond everything and everyone else, don’t you? Can you count how many times you were so thankful you were born in that family? Girl, they love you just as much. I just wish you would hug them more, tell them how much you love them more often. I know, I know, it’s too mushy, but aren’t you all mushy inside too? Sometimes people tend to forget this, but the family is where everything begins and ends. And a family is not just comprised of parents and children. Those who genuinely love you, are family too. So tell them all right? Remember, life is never too long, never too fair, never too perfect.
You’ve been a busy girl C. And yeah, that is good. But tell me, when was the last time you bought flowers just for the heck of it? Or the last time you went to the park to just walk around while enjoying ice cream on a cone? It’s the simple things C, that make life wonderful. Enjoy it, you deserve it. Life is never too giving. You work hard, and life gives you what you need, but for life to give you more, live it C. Don’t just exist, live. A long life does not mean it is more meaningful than a shorter one. Live life, don’t waste your time counting. Life is beautiful, but never too long, never too fair, never too perfect.
Is it good? Do you think it will make me cry? Too mushy? I look around, gave a deep sigh, and then smiled.Yup, I’m gonna miss this place.
Do I regret not having that one great love?
Will I miss my family? YES, but then I may be able to see them anyway. I’m going somewhere far, somewhere even I don’t know. All I know is that wherever it is, I will have all the answers. Happiness. Love. Life. Time. Space. What are they? Do they actually mean anything? I know. Will I tell you? No. It’s part of existing and living.
I should be going now. This house, it’s empty. Did I hold you up? Well go on now! Don’t mind me and my rants, did you understand a thing I said? If yes, well, congratulations. If not, well, no worries, if I were you I wouldn’t either. You’re still reading? Go! You have time in your hands. Oh, and before I forget, if you buy flowers, can you pick even just a piece of peony? I liked them a lot… Thanks…
P.S. Life is never too long, never too fair, never too perfect.
***This is a fictional work I made about a year ago. I don’t know what to call this really. I hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think.***